The Long Arm of the Law

I went to a King County Court this morning to mitigate a ticket I received in December. Here is what I learned:

• You absolutely cannot bring coffee into the courthouse. I was told to leave it, “OUTSIDE!” Which, I thought, meant outside the courtroom, but apparently actually means OUTSIDE the building. I had to throw my stupidly over-priced, yucky-tasting Starbucks latte away after two sips. I guess that’s what I get for buying a latte from Starbucks in the first place.

• If you have to walk through one of those stupid beeping weapon-checking machines, do not accessorize your outfit. I was the only person in a line of sketchmasters who had the wand brushed up and down my legs, middle and arms. I even had to lift my shirt to show them my belt buckle. Creeps. Pretty sure I was the only normal looking person there, driving a vehicle that had all four tires and headlights, AND a radio in my console instead of a boombox in the back seat. Got to love America.

• A large number of Mexicans are driving around in this city without driver’s licenses or insurance. Half the population of Washington State's Spanish-speaking citizens was in attendance at my hearing today. Every one of them didn’t speak English and required an interpreter. Every one of them had $1,000+ tickets for driving without a license or proof of insurance, in addition to their infraction. Not one of them understood the difference between a Mitigation Hearing or a Differed Hearing. I enjoyed listening to the ins and outs of the two choices six times this morning before we reached the English-speaking cases. While I felt really sorry for the individuals who had no idea what their choices were, I found it extremely funny when one asked the judge (through the interpreter), “Your honor, which is the better choice to have—a drivers license or insurance?”
  Um. I’m going to go with a driver’s license—if we really had the choice. Paying for insurance every month blows. Maybe I should move to Mexico.

• No matter the laundry list of excuses you give the judge for why you committed your infraction, (my favorite this morning was a man who said he was grabbing his wallet out of his pocket at the time he didn’t have his seatbelt on), it really isn’t going to get you that big of a reduction, and the legislature does not allow a judge to waive tickets anymore. So, I lost $60 of work to get a $60 reduction in my ticket…

Currently Feeling: Like I might puke if I eat another effing bowl of split pea soup this week.
Currently Anticipating: Drinking with the college crew tonight and celebrating a birthday in Portland tomorrow.
Currently Loving: The highlights Amanda put in my hair last night—for free!